EARLY MARRIAGE: THE DEBATE, A NEW AGENDA FOR THE FANI-KAYODE’S AND OTHERS

Hypocrisy%20GaugeTHE DEBATE
As it stands today, those who came out violently, spitting fire and brimstone against Senator Yerima and supporters of early marriage have failed to make a legitimate case against under-eighteen marriage after exhausting themselves. Their argument against early marriage was one of angry exclamations, names calling, pointless questions and hypocrisy. They failed big time to explain to us what makes eighteen a magical number that if a girl is not eighteen she should not be allowed to get married.

On our own part, we have argued firstly that early marriage is a practice encouraged in Islam and thus it is an issue of faith and belief, we refused to have non-Muslims and even ‘liberal Muslims’ dictate for us how to practice our religion.

Issues of belief and faith are issues that should not be debated, we as Nigerians must learn to live together, appreciate our differences. We should know that we are different, Muslims and Christians have differences (and) we are not having everything in common. We may have some issues in common like taking care of neighbour (etc)…these are issues that we should appreciate” Senator Yerima on AIT Kakaki

Secondly, we contended with evidence that under-eighteen marriage is practised in the so-called “civilised world” (United States and Europe etc). The antagonists of early marriage cried blue murder saying “you can’t compare Nigeria to developed countries? “, in response, we listed developing countries that marriage is not restricted to eighteen.

Then they screamed: VESICOVIGINAL FISTULA (VVF) hoping that would give them the argument, It did not. Their problems were compounded when we argued with statistics and research showing that VVF is as a result of delayed, unattended labour coupled with poor nutrition and not necessarily early marriage.

Toyin Fani-Kayode Bajela, the sister to the abusive and discourteous Femi Fani-Kayode, declared in one of her “emotional” write-ups that she has just enough grammar to speak up for young (Muslim) brides since they cannot speak for themselves. While crying more than the bereave she wrote: “You who for whatever ‘solid and noble’ reason have chosen to agree with legitimised child slavery, sexual abuse, psychological, emotional, physical and financial abuse under the guise of marriage. You who are silent about it or couldn’t care less as it’s not a topic worthy of inclusion in the constitutional review…” bla bla bla.

One striking feature about Islamophobes is that they don’t listen, facts do not exist to them because they ignore it. They just don’t get it that we are not complaining, but in hypocrisy, they keep taking panadol for another man’s headache. Muslim women who married early are not exactly silent about early marriage as being portrayed, Hauwa Umar twitted (@Uwani11):

I was married at 13 my first daughter is 34yrs now and first grandson is 17yrs, I am educated, very happy and enjoying in my matrimonial home

Aisha Abdul wrote on a post:

“VVF VVF VVF. What a chorus they may continue to sing. It’s their prerogative. Are all this hypocritical cries for sincere concern for the married girl or an attack against Islam/Muslims/Us? I got married at early age, alhamdulillah I am a professionally trained graduate, working, happy and grateful to Allah for my parents’ foresight. I am a Muslim, an advocate of marriage on the attainment of puberty for females and I am the happiest woman in the world. I don’t owe any ‘western subject’ any explanation. They can hang themselves if they so desire….”

I won’t insult anybody’s intelligence by suggesting anybody believes that Mrs Toyin Fani-Kayode and other loves the children of Muslims more than Muslims, but I will remind us of an incident few months ago when a young Muslim girl by name Aisha Alabi was flogged 43 times by one Mrs. E. C. Ukpaka for wearing the Islamic veil in school premises even outside school hours. These self appointed spokespersons were silent when we needed them to add their voice in condemnation of the criminal assault of our daughter by their own. They were silent and their silence was clear and unmistakable. Femi Fani-Kayode and his co-travellers like Roz Ben Okagbue, Stella Damasus, Aisha Osori, Helen Oviagbele, Oby Ezekwezile, Bisi Fayemi, Abike Dabiri-Erewa, Gbemisola Saraki, Nana Nwanchukwu etc should not and cannot speak for Muslims.

Aisha bint Abubakr the young wife of Prophet Muhammad (SAW) never complained of marrying too early and after the death of our beloved Prophet, she became one of the greatest scholars in Islamic history. Just like Aisha bint Abubakr (RA), Aisha Abdul, Hauwa Umar and millions of other Nigeria Muslims who married at an early age are not complaining. Our daughters who we married out at fourteen are not complaining now that they are thirty five. Twenty-one years into marriage, she is a mother to a child of about twenty, while still looking young and beautiful at thirty-five. Ma sha Allah.

A NEW AGENDA
Our advice to #childnotbride campaigners is that they should channel their campaign to those who needs it. Those young boys that are being defiled by those who supposedly took oath of celibacy and those young girls being violated by so-called “men of God” needs people to speak for them. I believe another crazy video by Stella Damasus can do a lot.

#banporn Our children are exposed to pornographic materials on the internet, movies, home videos, on the street where it is publicly display without any sense of decency. Nowadays, you can’t even look at Nigeria home video posters let alone watch the movies because of its sexual content. Pornography CDs and obscene magazines are sold in public places and a young child can watch naked women taking their bath on Big Brother Africa with just a press of a button. Who speaks for the children whose innocence is being violated and stolen everyday by pornography?

Why can’t the Fani-Kayode’s and the Stella Damasus of this world initiate a campaign against pornography? Many countries now filter internet websites that can be access in their country. Pornography sites and pages are inaccessible in China and UK is proposal a similar restriction, though milder. Why can’t Nigeria do the same?

#childnotprostitute Our overnight Moralists could also initiate a campaign against prostitution, especially “underage” prostitution. The rising number of prostitutes in our streets, especially in the Middle-Belt and South-South should be a cause for concern to our so-called civil society. Once again, just imagine another Stella Damasus crazy video to bring home this point.

#womennotsexobject Nigeria music and musical videos now carry themes that portray women as sex object and market commodities. We can canvass for the ban of obscene music and musical videos in the country thereby preserving and upholding the honour of womanhood.

Let this serve as an indication of the willingness of those of us on this side of the divide to partner with our overnight moralists, who only became moralists when the issue of early marriage became a national discuss. We urge them to take our challenge and partner with us in the struggle against moral perversion and its crippling effect in our society.

IGHO HAKEEM OHWOJEHERI
@naijainfoman Benin City
Shawwal 1, 1434 (08/08/2013)

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6 thoughts on “EARLY MARRIAGE: THE DEBATE, A NEW AGENDA FOR THE FANI-KAYODE’S AND OTHERS

  1. Pingback: PROF. AKINTOLA INTERVIEW ON YERIMAH’S MARRIAGE TO A ‘MINOR’ | naija infoman's notes

  2. Pingback: EARLY MARRIAGE: (MUSLIMS) WHERE OUR PROBLEMS LIE | naija infoman's notes

  3. What more can I say other than Jazakallahu khairan. This is a brilliant piece. I only hope to see more of people like you discuss about topical issues on TV and not a set of uneducated graduates. Barakallahu fih.

  4. Pingback: TAKE A BREATH: AN ADVICE FOR OUR OVERNIGHT MORALIST, STELLA DAMASUS | naija infoman's notes

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